


Human Kite: the flying hero

by BroflovskiBrosfan



Category: South Park
Genre: Brotherly Love, Story Arc, Superheroes, human kite - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-30
Updated: 2020-07-30
Packaged: 2021-03-06 00:14:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,129
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25614169
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BroflovskiBrosfan/pseuds/BroflovskiBrosfan
Summary: Kyle Broflovski/Human Kite’s parents disappeared in a trip to Miami, so Kyle and Ike have to live on their cousin’s house.Kyle has to deal with his wimpy and greedy cousin Kyle Schwartz, meanwhile, Ike is bullied at their new school for being Canadian.
Comments: 1
Kudos: 4





	Human Kite: the flying hero

**Warning: This is my first South Park fanfic on this site, also, the story happens before the events of Seasons 19-23, Kenny lines are parenthesised to indicate that they’re muffled.**

* * *

_***Kyle Broflovski POV*** _

It was a day like any other, my mother opened up my bedroom door and gently told me to wake up and get ready to school. As she exited the bedroom i put on my usual orange sweater and light green ushanka and made my way to Ike’s room. my father’s loud voice was not audible downstairs so i assumed he already went to work, although i could hear my mother moving around in the kitchen getting the breakfast ready.

Me and my little brother had breakfast, we brushed our teeth and went to the School bus point, Stan, Cartman and Kenny were already there.

"Hi, Kyle." Stan greeted me.

"(How are you?)" Kenny asked.

"I’m fine, guys." I replied back.

"Hey guys, did you know that Token is going to have a birthday party tomorrow?" Stan told us.

"(Nice.)"Kenny said.

"Sweet, his party will probably have a lot of food." Cartman got happy since he only cares about food because he’s a fat piece of shit.

"You’re not going to be invited to the party, fat ass!” I decided to be blunt and honest to him. "

"Why not, Kahl? I’m the coolest guy in the school." Cartman told me, i almost laughed at his stupidity.

"Because you’re a complete bully who often make racist jokes towards Token, also, everyone at school hates you!" I yelled at him.

"Fuck off, Kahl! You’re such a dirty Jew! Go the hell, asshole!" Cartman was pissed and mocked my faith like he always does.

"Shut up, fat boy!" I teased his weight back like i always do.

"If you call me fat again, i’m going to feed your stupid baby brother to the wolves!" Cartman threatened me, i can’t believe he would do that to Ike! What a psycho.

"If you try to hurt my brother, i’m going to kick your ass!" I warned him.

But then, this fat fuck suddenly pinched Ike, who started to cry, i got so mad at Cartman that i immediately punched him in the face. Stan hold me before i had the chance to punch Cartman again.

"Stop, Kyle! That’s enough!" Stan tried to calm me down.

I breathed and calmed down a little, Cartman was crying of course, but he deserved it for messing with my little brother.

"(Guys, the bus appeared.)" Kenny told us.

We got in the bus, i sitted with Stan and Ike in one of the bus seats, Ike was still crying.

"Don’t be sad Ike, Cartman is a dork." I tried to comfort him.

“He suwe is.” Ike babbled.

"If he pinches you again, i’ll break his fat legs". I told him. 

"Fine with me." Ike responded and stopped crying. I hugged my baby brother and he showed me his right arm.

"That fat boy pinched my arm, can you kiss it to relieve my pain?" Ike told me.

I got...kinda embarrassed. Ike probably got this idea from mom, she always kissed our knees and arms whenever we injured them, however, i couldn’t do that in front of Stan and i was going to say no. But then, Ike looked to me with puppy eyes. I had no choice… i needed to kiss my brother’s arm.

"Ok, Ike, i’ll kiss your arm."I reluctantly agreed.

I kissed my brother’s arm and Stan got weirded out by it.

"Thanks, bwother Kyle." Ike cheerfully thanked me, at least he was happy.

"Dude, what the fuck? You’ve kissed your baby brother’s arm??" Stan asked me, he was very disgusted.

"His arm got pinched by Cartman, remember? I needed to do something." I explained to Stan.

"Ok, so." He fortunately understood, though. The Bus stopped, we finally came to School and things only got worse.

* * *

At the School, i took Ike to the Kindergarten classroom, he was feeling much better, after that, me and Stan started to get our books from the lockers, however, a pink-hatted girl appeared, she is Stan’s on-again and off-again girlfriend, her full name is Wendy Testaburger and she is one of the most popular girls at school. Wendy probably wanted to talk with Stan about her girly problems or something like that.

"Hi Stan." She greeted him.

"Oh, hi Wendy." Stan greeted her back.

"Can we go watch a movie after school?" Wendy asked him.

"Sorry Wendy, but i already have plans for today." Stan bluntly replied to her.

"What plans? Playing Video Games or hanging out with your friends like you always do? Seriously Stan, you never have time to me." Wendy started to complain.

"Wendy, of course i do!" Stan explained to her, his voice sounded like he was bored.

"It’s been a week since we don’t do something together!" Wendy angrily yelled at him.

"We went to see a very stupid play at the theatre that was about Romeo and Juliet yesterday Wendy, fucking yesterday!" Stan raised his voice.

"But you fell asleep during the entire play!" Wendy told him.

"Did i?"Stan asked very confused.

Wendy was very saddened. "Boys are all the same, they always hurt the girls’ feelings." She ran off crying.

"Wow dude, is she always like that?" I asked him with curiosity.

"Wendy has been very uptight as of lately to the point that she whines for the smallest things." Stan told me.

"Oh, ok." I said, then, the school bell rang, i decided to not start a conversation about my super best friend’s relationship with Wendy since the class started now.

We got in the class and then, Mr. Garrison appeared. "Alright children, just remember that we’re gonna have a Math test today!" Mr. Garrison told us.

I knew it, that’s why i spent the whole night studying, i’m normally a good student, but Math is really hard.

"Oh Goddammit Mr. Garrison! Yet another Math test? What the fuck is wrong with you?" Cartman whined since he is a terrible student that hates studying.

"Eric, your grades are awful, which means you’re going to repeat a grade anyway." Mr. Garrison coldly told him.

It would be great if this fat racist fuck repeat a grade, i wouldn’t have to deal with his anti-semitism and rude behavior anymore.

"I’m going to give you the Math tests.” Mr Garrison said to us.

I was feeling a bit nervous yet relieved, since at least i studied a lot, Stan and Kenny also studied, since we all studied together at Stan’s house. But Cartman preferred to play Video Games at Butters’s house instead.

Mr. Garrison gave us the Math tests and went back to his desk, it was actually pretty easy, but Cartman was very nervous. I admit that i felt bad for him.

Then, Cartman started to look at my test, he knows that i take better grades than him, so, he decided to copy my awnsers.

"Stop looking at my test, fat ass!"  
I yelled at him.

"Shut your goddamn Jew mouth! I wasn’t even looking at your shitty test!" Cartman shamelessly lied.

I can’t believe! How someone can be so vile and sly?

"Eric! Stop looking at Kyle’s test or you’re going to the Principal’s class!" Mr. Garrison rightfully called him out.

"Fuck off, Mr. Garrison." Cartman insulted our teacher.

"Go to the Principal’s class now!" Mr. Garrison yelled at him. Cartman went to the Principal’s class, which means he’s going to be in trouble.

and he wasn’t no longer bothering me, at least this was what i thought.

After we all finished the test, it was recreation time, we went to the cafeteria, Stan, Kenny and i sitted on an empty desk.

"Where’s Cartman?" Stan asked.

"Who cares about Cartman? He is probably going to get detention again." I responded.

"(Kyle is right, we shouldn’t care about that fat boy.)" Kenny mumbled.

"Yeah, he is not even going to appear now." I told them.

Then, a blonde boy who goes by the nickname of Butters, showed up with a piece of paper.

"Kyle, Eric forced me to send this letter to you." Butters said.

He looked very frightened and i couldn’t understand why Cartman wrote a letter to me.

"Why he didn’t talk to me personally, dude?" I asked him, i wanted to know why that fucking fat ass did that.

"Just read it, Kyle!" Butters frightenedly replied to me, then he ran off screaming for some reason.

“What does it say?” Stan asked me.

I began to read it.

_"Dear Kyle, i want to apologize for trying to copy your test, i’m profoundly sorry. With love, Eric Theodore Cartman."_

*Gasp!* Seriously that he wanted to apologize?? He literally doesn’t feel remorseful for any shit he does, why he would apologize now????

"Holy crap! This asshole is bitching me up! Where is he?" I got pissed off.

"I don’t know." Stan responded, clueless.

"I’m going to find him!" I exited the cafeteria, i tried to find him on the School Hallway and then, i finally saw him getting in the Boys’ Bathroom. I went to the Boys’ Bathroom and caught Cartman doing something suspicious.

"Alright, fat ass! Why did you send a fake apology letter to me?" I angrily asked him.

Cartman had a liquid gun and shoot sanitary water that is filled with germs at me.

"Now you’re gonna smell like pee, stupid Jew!"

Cartman maliciously teased me.

Then, he exited the Bathroom all happy.

I angrily screamed, then, i got very saddened, I wanted to continue to get angry, but this time i couldn’t stay strong.

I started to cry, i cried until the school staff and Stan appeared.

I was very wet...due to pee and this fat fuck was constantly ruining my life by picking on me and my family...just because i’m Jewish.

I-i was sick of it.

* * *

After i calmed down, i took a shower on the school and Cartman got a suspension of two weeks, his mother went at School and she took him home. But i still was very angry at him.

The recreation was over, we had art class today, which is boring, but at least Cartman wasn’t there anymore.

Mrs. Streibel wanted us to draw a picture of a fruit basket, i picked up my brushes and i tried to draw it.

Then, i saw Stan, who was next to me, he seemed to be upset with something.

"Stan, what’s wrong?" I asked him.

"Wendy was sitting with Bradley today at the cafeteria, that bitch cheated on me."Stan told me, he was almost crying.

"Wow dude, that sucks." I said. "She probably wants to make me jealous, but i’ll not fall for it!" Stan said.

"Ok." I agreed with him.

* * *

A few hours later, the classes were over, me, Stan, Kenny and Ike went back to home.

It was a really stressful day, but i was happy that it’s finally over.

I got in my house with Ike.

"Mom, we are back." I warned her. However, mom and dad appeared with plenty of baggages.

I was initially confused, but then, i remembered that they were going to Miami today to celebrate their wedding anniversary.

This wasn’t the biggest problem, though. the only “bad” thing about this trip is that me and Ike were going to spend the weekend at my cousin’s house, his full name is Kyle Schwartz and he’s a complete wimp.

I tried to convince my parents multiple times to not let me and my little brother stay with this wuss for a weekend, but they obviously didn’t listen to me.

So, i gave up. "Come on boys, go pack your things." My mom said.

I went to my room and packed mostly my clothes and my iPhone 5, my mom won’t allow me to take my MacBook and Xbox 360 console to Cousin Kyle’s house of course, however, i saw my Human Kite costume.

I think it would be nice to take my superhero costume with me and i’ll play with my little brother, although Ike is just a little kid, he know more about superheroes than my own cousin, who is roughly the same age as me.

"Kyle!!" Speaking of Ike, he appeared at my room.

"What’s up, Ike?" I asked.

"Can you help me to pack my cwothes?" He asked me a favor.

"Ok, but we need to be fast." I told him.

We went to his room and i helped him to pack his things.

Later on, me and my family went to the car.

I thought it was going to be just a stupid weekend with my wimpy cousin.

But i was wrong, i was dead wrong.


End file.
